Johns Point of View
It was a warm summer evening, when (YN) my girlfriend and I walked down the streets, we were arguing with each other about stupid things. It was already really dark and we barely could see anything, we walked across the street. They next thing I know was that I woke up laying there on the ground, surrounded by paramedics. “(YN)” I screamed but nobody answered me. “Sir, could you please calm down, you just had a really bad accident” a paramedic said to me. “What has happened? I asked confused. “Sir, your girlfriend and you have been walking across the street, then a car came out of nowhere and crashed into you” the paramedic answered me. “Where is she, is she fine” I asked. “She lost a lot of blood, Sir but she will be fine” he said calmly. Then they took me into the ambulance and we drove down to the hospital. I couldn’t stop asking about (YN), I was so worried that I might never see her again. The doctor went in and looked at me then he said “You are going to have a few bruises and your hand is fractured, but you will be fine soon” he said. “Can I go and see my girlfriend?” I asked him. “Sir, I am sorry to tell you but we had to put her into artificial coma because she has a really bad head injury” the doctors said. I started crying immediately, it was all my fault I thought to myself. Then a nurse walked in, “Mr. Grimes, please come with me” she said. I followed her down the corridor, then we walked into a room. (YN) was laying there on the bed, I sat down on the bedside and linked my hand with hers. “If you want me to Mr. Grimes I can put a second bed into this room” the nurse said. I nodded my head and she walked out.
A week passed by slowly, I stayed in (YN)’s room all the time. I never left her side, I took care of her pretty much all the time. Mum and Dad came as often as they could, so did her parents. Edward my twin brother came to visit her once, he was too busy with working that’s why he couldn’t come around more often. What an awful excuse was what I’ve thought, he should be taking care of me as I used to do when we were little, but of course Edward was too focused on himself but I couldn’t care less for now as the only thing that really mattered for me was (YN). The doctor came in saying “Sir, we are now going to quit the artificial coma as her injury has been healing very well” he said. After a few minutes of waiting outside, I walked back in and saw that (YN) was slowly opening her eyes. I stroked her cheek gently “Hi, beautiful” I said and a tear of happiness streamed down my face. She looked at me, she looked slightly confused. “Who are you?” she said.
Your Point of View:
I woke up and felt a sharp pain in my head, I slowly opened my eyes. Right in front of me was standing a beautiful blond, pale tall guy, he stroked my cheek and said “Hi, beautiful”. I looked at him, why was this stranger stroking my cheek I thought to myself then I asked him “Who are you?” but he didn’t answered me, he just started crying . Then I looked around the room and realized that I am in a hospital. “Mrs. (your last name)?” the doctors said. I nodded my head, then the doctor whispered something into the guy’s ear and he left. “Mrs. (your last name) you had a very bad accident a week ago, you lost a lot of blood and your head has been injured as well” he said. I sighted , that’s probably why my head was hurting that much. “and it seems like you are also suffering memory loss” he said. I tried to speak, but I couldn’t . This was just way too much for me to handle right now.
Johns Point of View:
The doctor told me to go outside and so did I, a couple of minutes later I went back out of the room. “Your girlfriend Mrs Grimes is suffering memory loss” he said. “So, she really doesn’t know who I am? I asked. I whipped away my tears, “I am sorry to tell you but, apparently she really doesn’t know that you are her boyfriend” he said. “What do I do now” I asked him. “I think it’s best for Mrs (your last name) to go back home with you as she doesn’t need to be in the hospital any longer” he said. “Is her memory coming back” I asked. “That’s something we don’t know yet” he answered me. My whole body started shaking, and I tried to pull myself together but I couldn’t. (YN) the love of my life, the reason for me to live my life the fullest, doesn’t even know who I am I thought to myself. After I calmed down a bit, I walked back into (YN) room. I sat down on the chair next to her bed, “Hi (YN), I am John your boyfriend of 2 years” I said but she refused to speak to me, I stood up from the chair and started to pack up her belongings whilst she just laid there not even looking at me.
Back to your Point of View:
The blond guy walked back into the room, he sat down on the chair next to my bed. “Hi (YN), I am John your boyfriend of 2 years” he said. This couldn’t be true, I would remember being together with such an beautiful guy, but the last thing I remembered was that I was laying on my bed starring on the picture of my favourite boy band, I couldn’t remember the name of the band or their members I just knew that they were twins. I tried to remember their faces, but I couldn’t. I refused to speak with him for a while, but I needed answers so I asked him “How can I be sure, that you really are my boyfriend?” He looked at me, not knowing what to say. “you like music and you’ve always wanted to become a songwriter and you also have a big mole above your belly” he answered me, as he slightly smiled at me. “the mole isn’t that big” I said jokingly. So he really is my boyfriend I thought. “I guess, we life together?” I asked him. He nodded his head then he handed me some clothes and told me to dress myself. “Can you turn around whilst I change myself” I said.
He looked at my slightly confused but then turned around I quickly dressed myself and then we left the hospital together. I felt weird around him, as I couldn’t even remember one thing about him. We took a cap to our house, as we arrived I looked shocked at the huge house I was standing right in front of. “How can we afford a house like this” I asked John. “Long story” he said, “Are you coming?” he asked whilst he unlocked the door. I walked inside the house, got rid of my shoes and followed John into the living room. I couldn’t stop looking at the pictures on the wall, lots of pictures from me and John, we looked so happy on them. We sat down on the sofa and John made tea for us, “so (YN) what do you want to know?” he asked after a few minutes of silence. “How do we two now each other” I asked. “Where should I started?” he asked, “at the beginning” I said. Then he started to speak “it was a really crazy day, Edward and I had just landed in (your city) and some fans including you were waiting for us at the airport”
“Fans?” I interrupted him. “Oh crap you don’t know about that either, well actually Edward my twin brother and I are really famous singers, we call ourselves “Jedward” maybe you’ve heard that before” he said and sighted. “no I am sorry John, but I can’t remember anything” I answered, I felt so bad as I looked in Johns face, I saw that he was about to cry. “Oh John” I said and pulled him in for a hug. I could feel his tears rolling down my back, I couldn’t even imagine to be in his position, when someone who really means everything to you doesn’t remember anything about you. I knew there was a connection between us, but I wasn’t sure about whether I loved him or not. He pulled away from our hug, I whipped away his tears with my thumb. Then I leaned in to kiss me, but I stopped him with saying “John, please” “Sorry (YN), just an old habit I guess” he said with a sad voice. “Do you want to know more” he asked. “no John, I think it’s best for me to get some rest for now” I said. “Ok” he said and walked with me upstairs into the bedroom. “Should I sleep on the sofa tonight?” he asked, the whole situation we were in was really awkward. “No, you don’t have to John” I replied. Then he showed me my cupboard, I took out some PJ who looked really sweet and went into the bathroom which John has also showed me before. I changed quickly and then went back into the bedroom, John was already laying there on the bed, he gave me a quick smile and then I laid down next to him. I covered myself with the duvet and turned around to face John. “Do you want to know something (YN)” he whispered. “Yes, what?” I asked. “This is the PJ I have bought you to our one year anniversary” he said. I smiled as i knew something deep inside of me could remember John, I was sure about that. I laid my head down on John’s chest and he started to play with my hair, when I all the sudden got a flashback. “(YN)” John asked me slightly worried. I sat up in bed and looked at him confused “John, does the word pop rocket mean something to you?” I asked. John started laughing immediately, “John, I am being serious, ok?” I said confused about his reaction. “Well, yes it does mean something to me (YN)” “Why are you laughing then!” I asked him. “because you used to call my … you know (looked down on his pop rocket) like this & it’s a song from us ” he replied. I slightly blushed as I found it really embarrassing that I’ve actually called his private part like this.
I couldn’t even remember having sex once. So John has been the only one I’ve slept with I thought to myself. I laid back down to face John again. “Goodnight” I said. “Goodnight (YN)” John replied, then I turned around and fell asleep. The next morning when I woke up, John had already left. I went to the bathroom and took a long shower, after showering for what seemed a lifetime I went into the kitchen as I saw a note laying there on the table I picked it up and read “Went to the studio with Edward, when I come back home we are going to do something really special xx John”, I smiled at the note and I actually was really excited about what we were going to do. I decide to try to bring back some memories so I went upstairs into the bedroom and went through a lot of stuff, I couldn’t find something special. I knew when I lived back at home with my mum and dad I used to hide things under my bed so I walked over to the bed and looked under it, I found a small box. I took the box and sat down on the bed, the box was really dusty. I opened it and the first thing that caught my eyes was a picture of me and John kissing, I took the picture and started going through all the other stuff that was inside. I found a picture of me hugging Edward, I just knew it wasn’t John, don’t knew why. Then I found a letter I could recognise my handwriting, and started reading “Dear John, today has been the best day of my life, I met you and Edward and you gave me this really sweet bracelet. I’m actually wearing it right now, the other girls are so jealous because you gave it to me. I hope I will meet you again one day (YN). Then all the sudden I could remember everything about that day. Waiting on the airport for hours until they arrived, screaming with a lot of other girls and then they arrived my favourite singers Jedward. My thoughts got interrupted by John as he walked into the room, Edward standing right beside him. “John, I can actually remember the day on the airport” I screamed, I had to pull myself together as I actually was a little bit fangirling when I saw them both. I hugged John and quickly kissed his cheek, then I hugged Edward “Jedhug” I said whilst hugging him. I couldn’t stop smirking. “So, what are we going to do?” I asked them. “We are doing nothing, you and John are gonna do something” Edward said. “Oh” I said, “Just come with me” John said and took my hand, he leaded my outside the house. “Why are we leaving Edward alone at our house” I asked. “(YN), Edward is living with us” he said. Then we walked a few minutes down the streets we walked in a really nice park, and sat down on a bench. Then John started talking “you know (YN), this is the park were we first met, I mean were we had like our first date”, he blushed a little what I found looked really cute. “Cool” I said. Then we sat there a few minutes in silence. “You know John, this is actually so crazy, I mean I can remember being a crazy fangirl, but never in my life would I’ve thought that I was going to be your girlfriend one day” I said.
John smiled and gestured for me to sit down on his lap, so I sat down on his lap. We looked deeply into each others eyes. “Do you want to know something?” he asked. I nodded my head, “this is also the bench were we both first kissed” he said as he leaned in to kiss me, is kissable lips touching mine, his warm tongue sliding across my bottom lip. It felt amazing and I got a really weird feeling inside my belly. I kissed him back passionately our tongues gently massaging each other. After I while off kissing I pulled away from him. “I am freezing” I said. “Let’s go home then” John said then we went back home the whole way back to the house we didn’t talk to each other, as we reached our house John unlocked the door, Edward was sitting in the living room watching telly. John just said “Hi” to him and then walked upstairs without saying anything to me, I was slightly confused that he was acting weird now as I was the one who doesn’t remember anything about our relationship. I headed to the sofa and sat down next to Edward, “what’s up?” I asked him. “nothing” he replied “Edward.. can I ask you something?” I whispered. “Yes, what?” he said. “is John alright?” I asked. “I dunno (YN) I really don’t know, we aren’t that close like we were 2 years ago” he said and sighted. “Why?” I asked. “ long story (YN)” he said and then switched off the telly. “it’s because of me isn’t it?” I said but Edward refused to answer me. “Edward, I can take it, seriously” I said. “not just about you” he said and then left me sitting there on the sofa all by myself. I felt tears filling up my eyes, I was about to cry, I felt so guilty. What has really been happening the last past 2 years? I felt something really special when I kissed John, but why was he ignoring me now? Did I do something wrong? I questioned myself. I got up from the sofa and walked upstairs, as I reached our bedroom door I heard John crying quietly. I quickly opened to door and saw John laying there on the bed, his duvet was covering his whole body. “John” I said. “Please (YN) go I don’t want you to see me like this” he replied “No” I said and headed to the bed.
I laid down next to him and pulled to duvet over me too, so now we both were laying there covered with the duvet. “I am so sorry” I said and wrapped my arms around him. “It’s not your fault” he said snivelling. I whipped away his tears and slightly kissed his cheek. “Why are you crying then?” I asked. “I am scared that you won’t be able to remember me (YN), what if you find a nice normal guy and fall in love with him” he said, tears streamed down his face again. “John, you don’t have to be scared because I am not leaving you, even if my memory is not coming back” I answered him. “Why wouldn’t you?” he asked. “John, because I am falling in love with you all over again” I said shyly. I could catch him smiling quickly. “Really?” he said and then I leaned in to kiss him, our lips touching each other, both of us completely enjoying this special moment. Our kiss turned into making out, John’s hands gently moving over my whole body, I liked it even though it was kind a new for me. (YN) you can do this, this isn’t your first time, it’s your boyfriend I thought to myself to calm myself down a bit. Then I decided to undress myself, John looked at me and asked “Are you sure, we don’t have to?” he said. I nodded me head and we both undressed ourselves. John climbed on top of me, I was unsure about what would happen next. John started kissing my neck gently, leaving behind a trail of wet kisses, which made me moan out quietly. “You’ve always liked this” he whispered into my ear which made me giggle. I could feel his already hard pop rocket digging into my thighs, I looked down and so did John. His face slightly blushed, “Ready, it doesn’t hurt I promise” he said and then guided himself into me. I moaned out loudly as he entered me. Then he started to thrust his hips, it felt amazing, after a while of continuing we both reached our climax. John climbed off of me and wrapped his arms around me tightly. Then he kissed my cheek, “John, can you do something for me?” I asked. “Anything you want beautiful” he said smilingly. “Please, talk to Edward”. John frowned at me “why should I?” he asked, “because John he is your twin and I think you both aren’t that close as you have been before” I said.
“(YN) you don’t even have a clue about it” he replied. “Then tell me” I answered. “it’s a long story” John practically shouted at me. I stood up from the bed and dressed myself “You completely ruined this moment John, it’s just talking I didn’t tell you to kill somebody” I said and then left the room. Where am I going now I asked myself, I had to think quick before John even tries to follow me I thought, then I tiptoed upstairs not even having a clue where I was going, then I reached an attic at least something that looked like it was. Perfect, John wouldn’t come upstairs, as he probably was thinking that I went outside I thought. I looked around the, the attic was quiet big and a lot of moving boxes were inside. To my surprise there also was a big comfy bed behind them. It looked like someone used to sleep there, I sat down on the bed and started to think things through, I had so many question but neither Edward nor John would give them to me. Both of them seemed to be afraid of my reaction at least that’s what I’ve thought. I sat there for a long time not doing anything, I didn’t even heard noises from downstairs so I guessed nobody was home, they were probably searching for me I thought. I felt bad for hiding, and to worry them but at least they could talk to each other whilst they were searching I thought to calm myself down a bit. I walked over to the boxes and opened one, the box was full of fan letters. I closed the box because I didn’t wanted to read something, that didn’t belonged to me. All the sudden I heard someone screaming loudly, “It’s your fault John, it’s all because of you” it was Edward, I heard John screaming to but I couldn’t hear what I was shouting, they kept shouting for a bit and then I heard doors banging. I could hear footsteps, someone was about to come to the attic. I quickly ran over to the bed and tried to hide myself but that was clearly not possible. The door opened quietly, then I saw Edward. “What the hell?” he said quietly. “Please ‘Edward, don’t tell John” I said. Edward nodded his head and walked over to the bed. “What are you doing here” he asked me. “had an argument with John” I answered. “I know, but why are you hiding here we were searching for you” he said.
“I don’t know, I thought I wouldn’t search for me here” I said. Edward looked in to my eyes and said “I guess you are used to hiding here” he smiled. “What are you on about?” I questioned him. “Nothing (YN)” he replied “you should probably go downstairs and talk to him, he is going crazy” he said. I nodded my head, “Edward, but before I leave I want to know one thing – why is everything Johns fault” I asked and looked at him. Edward’s facial expression immediately changed, he looked like he was scared of something. “I was just angry because John was being a jerk” he said. I knew he was hiding something, but he was clearly too scared to tell me. I stood up from the bed and walked to the door but before I left I said “I know you two are hiding something, it’s not fair to keep things from me, you both should remember that my memory is coming back sooner or later. I closed the door behind me, and walked downstairs. I didn’t want to face John now, but I had to as I knew he was really worried. I went to our bedroom but John wasn’t there, I walked downstairs and as I reached the last step, John saw me. I ran over to me and hugged me tightly “promise me that you’ll never scare me that much again, where have you been (YN)” I pulled away from the hug “in the attic” I answered. “Why were you hiding in the attic?” he asked he seemed confused and a bit angry. “don’t know, John seemed like the right place to hide” I answered. “Yeah, you’ve always liked the attic don’t you” he whispered he was clearly pissed off I could hear it in his voice. “John, what is going on with you and Edward, can’t you two just be honest with me?” I screamed . “Give me answers now, or I swear I will leave now for good and I’ll never come back” I threatened him, but I again refused to tell me everything so I ran upstairs and took a random bag and packed up some stuff of mine, John followed me. He tried his best to calm me down, but this was just too much for me. John took the bag away from me and said “You aren’t leaving (YN), stop being stupid”, I was so angry at John that I couldn’t handle my emotions anymore. I started screaming like crazy “I am leaving John, go away give me the bag and fuck off I don’t even love you, you are a stranger to me” I screamed. Then Edward walked in our room “(YN) calm down” Edward said. John directly headed to Edward and slapped him in his face. “Fuck off Edward” he screamed into his face. Edward just stood there not doing anything. “Are you stupid John?” I screamed and walked over to Edward, I took his hand and leaded him outside the room, before I left I screamed “I regret being your girlfriend, even though I don’t remember anything” I shut the door behind me and Edward and we both walked outside the house. “What are we doing now?” Edward asked. “We are staying at my mums” I answered. Then we took a cap to my mums house, I knocked on the door and my mum opened me “(YN) what are you doing here?” she asked. “Mum could Edward and I stay overnight, John is not around and we both forgot our keys” I lied. I could tell that she knew that I was lying. “Sure” she said.
Edward and I walked inside the house. We drank a cup of tea with my mum and then we walked back into my old room. We sat down on my bed “She knows we are laying” Edward said “I know Edward” I answered him. “Are you scared of John?” I asked him. “No, not really” he said. “I need answers Edward, I really do” I said and sighted. Edward stood up from the bed and looked outside the window then he started to speak “I feel so bad that I am the one who has to tell you this, but to be honest, for once at least, John did nothing wrong he is just scared to lose you and I completely get it you know” he said. “Edward, please get to the point now” I said. “He thinks we had an affair” he said. “What?” I asked. “Before the accident happened, we both used to spend much time together in the attic” he said. OMFG I thought to myself what an awful girlfriend have I been, I better should have died after the accident happened. “Does this mean I was cheating on him with you” I managed to say. “No (YN) don’t be stupid, you would have never cheated on him and we don’t like each other this way” he said. “Then what were we doing in the attic?” I asked him. “After you’ve found out about me being in love with this girl, she is a fan you know we tried to find her letter to get her address because I really want to get to know her” he answered shyly. “I didn’t wanted John to know because he is so used to protect me and he doesn’t want me to get hurt, and well you’ve found out and I needed help you promised not to tell him” he said. I was so confused, first it seemed like John was the bad guy, then I thought I was the bad one cheating on him with Edward and now, everything was just a complete misunderstanding. “What do we do now?” I was so confused, this whole situation I was in was just ridiculous. “What are we doing now” I asked again. “I don’t know” Edward answered me, he seemed really upset. “Come on Edward, I am the one who doesn’t remember anything, not even the slightest thing” I said, I looked at him, I was getting really angry at him.
“Just because you didn’t had the guts to tell him, look what you’ve done” I spoke out loudly. “(YN) calm down, please I didn’t wanted to cause trouble I swear” he said, I could barley hear him as he tried to speak as quiet as possible so that my mum wouldn’t hear anything. “We are leaving now Edward, I don’t care of you want to talk to him or not you just have to” I said. Then we both went upstairs. “Mum, we are leaving, the locksmith is coming over to our house” I said, mum looked at me slightly astonished. “Can I talk to you for a second? “ she asked me and then looked at Edward “alone” she said. “I’ll wait outside” Edward said and walked outside, “(YN), why are you lying at me?” me mum asked. “I am not” I replied. “I overheard you and Edward when you were talking don’t you dare lie now” she said. “Things are complicated mum, I feel like I am living a nightmare. I don’t remember my boyfriend and nothing else from the last past 2 years” “everybody could lie to me, everybody could tell me stories that actually never happened, I don’t know who I should trust I don’t know who is telling the truth” I answered, mum hugged me tightly. “You know (YN), John loves you and you should trust him after all he was the one who was sitting next to your bed all day, holding your hand after the accident” she whispered into my ear. “Thanks mum” I said and pulled away from the hug. “Take Care” she said as I left the house too.
Edward was already sitting in the cab, I sat down in the back of the car and then we started driving back to our house, before Edward unlocked the door I said to him “He must be really angry, so keep distance” , Edward nodded his head and we both went inside. As we reached the living room we saw John sitting there on the sofa, he looked at us and I could see I was about to go mental. “Back, so early? Oh Edward I thought you could to better, I mean when I fucked her it wasn’t that quick” he said and grinned at us evily. “We didn’t do anything” Edward said. “Common bro, I know you fucked her, I wasn’t enough for her” he screamed. Then he stood up and headed to me, he faced me and screamed into my face “You dirty little slut”, tears filled up my eye, I know he was angry but couldn’t he just listen for once? “John, please calm down, I swear nothing happened ever, you are my twin you should know I never would do something like this and neither would (YN)” Edward said calmly. John faced away from me and looked at Edward “then why are you both keeping secrets and run away with each other” he asked him. Then Edward told him the whole story, I was just sitting there not saying anything as those words John called me really hurt me. After Edward had told him everything, John apologised a couple of times for his reaction but he also was a bit hurt by the fact that we kept something like this a secret from him. “I am going to bed, I think you two have a lot to talk about” I said and went to upstairs into the bedroom. Neither John nor Edward said anything to me when I left. I went to the bathroom and took a long shower, to clear my thoughts. I shouldn’t be angry at John because he called me a slut, but I was. I knew he didn’t mean it but on the other hand, I knew that I loved him otherwise I would be that angry. After the shower I laid down in bed, I couldn’t sleep I was just waiting for John to come and to talk, I waited for a long time but John didn’t showed up. So I headed upstairs to see what they were doing as I reached the living room I saw them laying there on the sofa, both fast asleep, both had a smile on their face. Then all the sudden some parts of my memory came back.
*Flashback*
I could see John clearly, it was in the park we were sitting on the bench we sat the day before, he sat there not looking at me, shyly smiling at me. Then I remembered kissing him and the special feeling I felt. He seemed so happy and so did I, then I remember how he asked me if I wanted to be his girlfriend, it was such a special day, we both fell in love immediately. I even could remember who I lost my virginity to John, actually we both lost our virginity together. I did remember his touches and his sloppy kisses, he was so scared to hurt me and he really was gently, it hurt a bit but it was special. I remembered feeling special, whenever John was around, but I also remembered who much hate they got when the fans found out about me. The last thing I could remember was moving in with him and Edward and what a stressful day this has been, moving boxes all around the house.
Then I got back to reality, I felt dizzy, and my head was pounding like crazy, I looked at John and Edward both of them were still sleeping, laying there on the sofa. I walked over to the sofa and woke up John “John, come with me upstairs” I whispered in to his ear. John just nodded his head and walked with me upstairs still half asleep. We laid down on our bed, “John?” I asked, “Yes” he replied “I don’t want you to be mad at me, believe me I didn’t mean what I said earlier and I hope you didn’t mean what you’ve said about me earlier” I said. “I was just angry (YN), I was so scared to lose you and the fact that I thought you and Edward would betray me like this was just crazy” he answered. “I do love you John” I said, “I love you too (YN) he said. “and I do remember more now” I said, John smiled “what do you remember?” he asked and pulled his arms around me tightly. “Everything until the day we moved in here” I said. “That’s a great progress you know” he said and kissed my cheek. “I know, I’ll hope that I will remember everything one day” I said. “You know, you don’t have to remember everything, we had our ups and downs the last few months” he said. “Why?” I asked. John sighted “I don’t know if I should tell you” he said slightly worried. “I can take it” I said. “I wanted to take our relationship to the next level, not marriage though I wanted to start a family and you said you weren’t ready now” he said whilst he looked away from me. I sighted “John?” I said and looked at him, “we should try” I said.
“What should we try?” he asked. “trying to get pregnant” I answered I could see the huge smile on John’s face. “Do you really think we are ready for this, we don’t have to, we have time” he said, but I stopped him by kissing him, our lips gently touching each other, our tongues collided, I climbed on top of John and started kissing his neck roughly. I was desperate for his touches, I now we only did it yesterday but yesterday was different from today because I actually could remember something, I now know what John likes. “This is going to be so special” I whispered in his ear. He giggled slightly then I started to take off his shirt and reviled his pale, sexy body I touched his abs and went further down to unbutton his jeans and then I took it off too. John was now laying there just in his underwear, I slightly squeezed his already hard pop rocket through his underwear which made him moan out loudly. Then I quickly undressed myself, John got rid of his boxers and I started to ride him, we both moaned in pleasure. “OMFG” I screamed as I reached my orgasm. A few minutes later John reached his too. I collapsed on top of John, he was still inside of me, I rested my head on his chest and we continued to lay there for a while. I climbed off of John and laid down next to him, “I hope we didn’t woke Edward up” I whispered. Then John and I started to giggle. “I love you” I said “I love you too” John said and then we both fell asleep.
The next morning I woke up, John was still fast asleep, I quickly dressed myself and went downstairs to the kitchen. Edward was sitting there on the table, eating cereal. “Morning” I said “Hi” Edward said. “I am glad that you and John made up Edward, and I have to tell you something, I do remember everything until the day we moved in to this house” I said. “I am too, seriously (YN) this is amazing” Edward said and smiled. “How are things with you and the fan girl, you love so much” I asked. “not good” Edward replied. “Why?” I asked “we were secretly dating for a while, but I guess you know she wasn’t worth it” he answered me. I could tell I was keeping something from me, this wasn’t just an normal answer this was more of a heavy hint. “What are you on about Edward” I asked. “(YN) you know exactly what I am talking about, I am not playing your stupid game anymore, don’t act like you don’t remember anything” he said. “Edward, what’s wrong with you” I asked. “I believed you at first, but then I overheard you and John yesterday, it’s a bit strange that you can remember everything till the day we moved in, don’t you think?” he said annoyed. “Edward, I don’t know what you are talking about” I replied. What was really happening the last few months? “Come on (YN), I know that you know so stop pretending” he said. “I am… “ I said but our conversation got interrupted by John who walked into the kitchen. “Morning Guys” he said and then went over to kiss my cheek, I looked at Edward and he looked at me. Something was different this time, he looked really jealous I thought.
“Edward, (YN) and I are going to try to get pregnant” John said with excitement. Edwards face went bright red “I thought you wanted to wait?” he asked. “no, I am ready for starting a family with John know” I said to answer is question. Then Edward stood up and as he walked out of the room I heard him saying in a low voice “Whatever”. Now I was confused more than ever, why was Edward acting like this all the sudden? “(YN) Have you been fighting with Edward?” John asked. “No, we weren’t why?” I lied. “I seemed a bit upset, that’s all” he replied. “Anyway, I have to get ready now beautiful, but when I come home we should try again, if you want to” John said and wrapped his arms around my waist. “Sure” I replied and kissed him, than he went upstairs to get ready. There I was, again confused not knowing any answers. I sat down on the chair and drank a cup of tea, after that I walked into the living room and started to clean up the mess from the last past days. I cleaned for a while, John had already left and Edward was still at home. I wasn’t sure about whether I should try to talk to him or not, but there was one thing I was sure about, I needed to know what he was on about. So I headed upstairs, I knocked on Edward’s door and opened it, but he wasn’t there. His room looked so familiar.
I know I had been there before, the next thing I did was I went upstairs into the attic, because I knew we used to spent a lot of time there. I walked straight through the door and saw Edward sitting there in the corner of the attic, holding a letter in his hands. “Leave” he screamed at me. “Edward? Tell me the truth now, and don’t you dare lie to me again” I snapped back at him. “Fine, you really want to know the truth (YN)? You have been cheating on John with me, ever since we moved into this house, this bed here – was ours, we used to fuck each others brains out right there every time John was away” he screamed. Tears filled up my eyes, my sight went blurry and the next thing I could remember was that I was laying there on the bed in the attic, Edward looking worried over me. “What happened?” I asked him. “You passed out“ he answered. “Did I loved you?” I asked him, tears rolled down my cheek. “I think you did” he answered me and whipped away my tears. “Edward I love John, I am sorry” I managed to say. He sighted, I saw he was really upset about what I’ve just said. “Everything is my fault Edward, I destroyed everything I think its best that I am leaving now, I am going to tell John that I can’t life with him anymore because I don’t want to start a family yet” I said. “(YN), please don’t you will make everything worse than” he said. “No, believe me it’s for the best” I answered and stood up and walked upstairs into our bedroom, packed a bag and wrote a note for John saying “John, I am sorry I do love you, but I am not ready for this now, remember I will always love you me leaving is the best choice for all of us” and then I left the house, I looked back, a single tear rolled down my cheek. I will miss you, John I said to myself.
I went to my mum’s place, my eyes were red and sore from crying. “(YN), what happened” my mum said as she opened the door, she hugged me. “I am such a bad person mum, I really I am” I said. “No you aren’t sweetie, who did this to you” she replied. “I did this to myself mum” I said and started crying immediately. “Come on in, and we talk about it” she said. Then we went to the living room we talked for a long time, I told her everything. I could tell that she was really disappointed, but she offered me to stay at her place as long as it takes. I was really tired after our long talk, so I went upstairs into my old room. I unpacked my bag and sat down on my bed, I turned my phone on but there were now new messages or calls, so I knew that Edward told John everything. I just hoped that they would both move on and be there for each other, I wasn’t worth fighting for. I cried myself to sleep and prayed to never wake up again.
Months later
Things have been really hard for me the last past months, two days after I moved into my mums house all my other belongings were sent there, with a note from John saying “you made the best decision for all of us and a part of me will always love you”. I was reading the note again whilst I was sitting there on the sofa gently stroking my big belly “Yes John, a part of you will always be with me” I said. I found out about my pregnancy 8 months ago, next month I will give birth to John’s child. At first I was unable to cope with the situation but my mum helped me through everything. I was unsure about telling John and I decided it was best to stay out of his life for good. I can still not remember some parts of my memory, but I think that’s my fault because I really never wanted to know what an awful human being I had been back then. I caused so much trouble and sadness, that’s for sure but I made the best out of it. For some of you this may sounds weird, but it’s true. I could have stayed with John if I wanted to or worse I could have left John for Edward.
On March the 11th I gave birth to my beautiful daughter “Ava”, she looked just like John blond hair, pale skin, full lips and green eyes. She was the most beautiful child I have ever seen. I imagined John being there with us, he would be so happy if he would know. I sat there on the sofa with Ava in my arms, I showed her pictures of me and John. “This is your dad, honey” I said and pointed at the picture. “He is a famous singer and the most adorable guy if ever met in my life” I said. Ava couldn’t answer, she was just a baby back then. She used to laugh so much and everything about her reminded me of John. It was hard being a single mum, because I had to work a lot to pay for the rent and bills but I had to do it, Ava deserved to life a happy life, the next 5 years passed by so quickly. The older Ava got the more she reminded me of John. That day I picked Ava up from school, she seemed so confused. “What’s wrong hunny” I asked her. “Mummy, I really want to meet my daddy” Ava said, I looked in her green big eyes. She gave me the exact same look that John gave me when I really wanted something. “Hunny, I told you that your daddy doesn’t know about you I am sorry” I answered her. “this is so unfair mummy, all the other children have a dad and I don’t” she answered me, tears filled up her eyes. “Don’t cry sweetie, I will try to talk to him I promise” I answered. On the way home I couldn’t stop thinking. How do I contact John? Who would he react, after all those years? What if he already has a family? But there was only one thing to find out, I had to contact him.. Ava deserves to know her Daddy.
Later that day
The only thing I knew about John was the address of the house we used to live in together, I hoped that he still lives there as there was actually no other way to contact him. I don’t wanted to go, I had to do this for Ava and John, they both deserved to get to know each other. Ava is his daughter, no matter what happened in the past. No matter how much I still love him after all those years. “Mummy” Ava said as she walked in the living room, “Yes” I said “I love you, mummy” she said cutely. “I love you to, you don’t know how much I do” I answered her. I lifted her up and hugged her tightly, “but it’s time to go to sleep, go brush your teeth” I said. I let go of her and she walked into the bathroom. After brushing her teeth Ava laid down in her bed, “Do you want me to read a bedtimestory?” I asked her. “No mummy, I already know all of them” she answered me. “ok hun, sleep tight, I love you” I said and kissed her cheek. “Goodnight” Ava answered me. I went back into the living room and tried to get my thoughts of off John, but I didn’t work. After a while I went back into Ava’s room she was fast asleep, she looked like an angel. “Now or never” I quietly told myself. Then I started packing up some clothes, I lifted Ava up and carried her into my car. She was still fast asleep. Then I started driving in the middle of the night, 2 long hours later in the early morning I arrived at his house. I parked across the street and looked at the house, nothing had changed it still looked the same. “Mummy, where are we” Ava asked still half asleep. “sweetie, mummy needs to do something, can you wait for me here and promise me not to go anywhere I’ll be back in 2 minutes” I answered her. Ava nodded her head, I got out of the car and locked it. I walked across the street, I was getting really nervous, I reached the front door and then knocked slightly. I waited for a few minutes until somebody opened the door, but it wasn’t John. It was a beautiful young woman “Who are you and what are you doing here so early?” she asked unfriendly. “Sorry to bother you at this time, but is John Grimes still living here” I asked I tried my best to sound friendly. “Yes, my husband is still living here, what do you want from him?” she questioned me. I felt like crying, when she told me she was his wife “I need to talk to him, its important” I answered her. “Sorry, he is not at home give me your phone number and I will tell him to call you” she answered me harshly. I gave her my phone number and before she could ask me who I am I told her that I am in a hurry and left. I got back into the car, Ava was sleeping again. Tears streamed down my face, I couldn’t believe that John was married to this woman. I whipped my tears away and reminded myself of everything that has happened in the past. I frightened when somebody suddenly knocked on the car window, it was Edward.
He looked at me in shock, than I got out from the car. My whole body was shaking like crazy. “What are you doing here (YN)” Edward asked. “I need to talk to John” I answered him. “After all those years (YN) please just leave him alone” he said. “I can’t Edward, there is a reason why I am here” I said and pointed on Ava, who was still sleeping in the back of the car. “Ava wants to get to know her daddy” I said calmly. “What has happened in the past wasn’t her fault, it was mine” I said before Edward could say something else. “He is her father?” he asked in shock. “Yes” I answered him. Then we just stood there for a while not saying something. “When are you going to tell him?” he asked harshly. “I gave his wife my phone number, she said she will tell him to call me” I answered. “She won’t” Edward said. “Why?” I asked. “Because she knows exactly who you are!” he answered. “Edward please help me” I managed to say before I broke out in tears. “Don’t cry please” Edward said and then pulled me in for a long hug. “She wants to meet her dad Edward, she keeps asking me about him… she needs him” I stuttered. “I really want to help you (YN) but I can’t” he whispered in my ear. Then he left without even saying goodbye, leaving me there standing all by myself.
I went back into the car and started drove all the way back to my place. The whole way home I couldn’t stop thinking. Back at home Ava started to ask so many questions, I just couldn’t answer them, than I called my mum and asked her if she could take Ava over the weekend as I really needed to think things through. 2 hours later my mum arrived and took Ava with her, I felt a bit relived after they left. I sat there on the sofa when I heard someone knocking on the front door. I went to open the door, probably mum just forgot something I thought. I opened the door and said “Mu..m” but it wasn’t her. It was John, he looked so sexy, more manlier. I gazed in his beautiful green eyes, still in shock of course. “We both need to talk, may I come in” he said calmly. “Come on in” I answered him. We went in to the living room and sat down on the sofa. “Did Edward tell you” I asked him. “Edward? What should he be telling me (YN)?” he answered confused “Why are you here than, after all those years?” I asked him. “Because, you were at my place earlier and you said to my manager that you needed to talk about something important? He said. “Manager? She told me she was your wife?” I said. “She thought that you are one of those fans who still come by from time to time – she keeps telling them that she is my wife” he said and smiled. “So how comes that you want to talk about something now after 5 years?” he asked “well, John there is something I have to tell you and I am really sorry I didn’t told you 5 years ago” I said and sighted. “tell me” he said nicely. “Don’t be like that John, don’t be nice I don’t deserve it, believe me” I stood up from the sofa and started speaking “John, do you remember when we tried to get pregnant?” I asked. He nodded his head. “I got pregnant” I nearly whispered. “What Pregnant, does this mean?” John said in shock. “Yes, her name is Ava, your daughter’s name is Ava” I said. “Daughter” was all he managed to say I waited for his reaction, for him to scream at me and leave but he continued sitting there on the sofa in silence.
“I am sorry John” I said. A looked at him, a single tear streamed down his face. I felt so guilty, “Can I see her” he asked. “Of course, but she is with my mum now” I answered. “You know (YN), I get that you left me, because you weren’t ready for a family back then but why didn’t you come back after you’ve found out that you are pregnant? “ he asked. I was confused, what was he talking about? Then all the sudden I heard someone knocking on the door again. “I’ll be back soon” I said and walked to the front door, “What are you doing here?” I asked as I opened the door, Edward standing right in front of me. He went inside my house without even asking “Where is John” he asked and then followed me in to the living room. “(YN), John I swear I didn’t mean to do those things, please forgive me please” he nearly screamed. “What are you on about?” we both asked at the same time. Then he started speaking “I lied (YN), we never had an affair I just couldn’t handle the thought that you love John not me” he screamed. “bastard” John screamed and stood up to face Edward. “Leave now, or I swear I will kill you” John screamed in his face. Then suddenly all the missing parts of my memory came back finally after waiting for them all those years, my sight went blurry and I knew that I was about to faint. I woke up after a while, still a bit dizzy. My head was resting on John’s lap, “Where is he John” I asked “He left, I just hope I never comes back”” he whispered. I sat up and faced John “Edward ruined our lives, John he did” I said to him. John nodded and then started crying. “I just can’t believe my own brother would do something like this, this is so selfish, what was he thinking?” John stuttered. I hugged John tightly, than we both sat there for a while not saying anything. There were actually now words to say, what Edward did was so wrong. It was his fault that Ava never got to meet her daddy, he made me believe that I was a horrible person, all those years I have suffered for nothing.
“Do you want to see pictures of Ava” I asked. “Yes, of course” he answered me, than I showed him pictures of Ava. “She looks like me” he said with tears filling up his eyes. “Yeah, she is beautiful” I answered him and smiled, John looked deeply into my eyes. Then he leaned in to kiss me, his soft lips touching mine and there it was the amazing feeling I always got when I kissed him. Our kiss got more rougher, I sat down on Johns lap whilst we continued to kiss, his hands moved all over my body. “John, stop it” I whispered as he tried to unbutton my skinny. “Oh sorry, we don’t need to you know, it just seemed so right” he answered sweetly. “Oh John, I really want to do this but we should continue in my bedroom” I said. Then I led him into my bedroom, we both stripped out of our clothes and jumped on my bed, then John climbed on top of me and started to kiss my neck, I felt his already hard pop rocket digging into my thigh. “Do it” I moaned as I was really desperate to feel him inside off me. Then I guided his pop rocket inside of me. “ooh my good” I screamed in pleasure as John started to thrust his hips then he went faster and faster until we both reached our orgasm. We continued to lay there both of us out of breath, our hearts beating fast. “I’ve missed you so much” I said whilst John climbed off of me. “I missed you too (YN)” he answered me whilst he pulled the duvet over us, to cover our still naked bodys. He wrapped his arms around my waist and we both fell asleep immediately.
I woke up in the morning with a huge smile on my face, John slightly kissed my cheek. “morning, beautiful” he whispered “morning” I replied. “(YN), can I ask you something?” he said, “anything” I replied. “Would you like to move in with me, with Ava of course” he asked. “John? Are you serious? Of course I want to” I answered with excitement. “I still love you, you know” he nearly whispered, I kissed him. “I love you so much John” I answered him. I was the happiest girl in the world to call him my boyfriend again after all those years.
Months later
“Mummy, Daddy his back” Ava screamed from the kitchen. I went into the kitchen and saw John holding Ava in his arms. “Hi” I said and pecked him. Then he gently stroked my belly. “Hi, there” he said to my belly. “He or she, is doing a lot of movement in there” I said jokingly. “Daddy, I have to show you so much come with me” Ava said. “I’ll be back in a second” John said and kissed my cheek. I knew that this was going to take a long time, John wasn’t gone that long but Ava always had to show him everything she did whilst he was away. She clearly loves her daddy even though she just knows him for a short time, Edward was gone for good, he sometimes texted John to let him know he was still alive, but he wasn’t going to come back ever again and we don’t talk about him anymore. I enjoyed being pregnant again, because John and I really wanted to. I waited for 2 hours before John came back from Ava’s room. “Sorry, but she was so excited I just couldn’t leave her” he said and smiled. “I know, sometimes I think she loves you more than me” I said teasingly “come on (YN) don’t be stupid” he answered and smiled. “How are you, how is the baby?” he asked and sat down next to me. “Everything is fine John” I answered him and then I leaned in to kiss him “as long as you are with me” I whispered. “I am never going to leave you anyway” he replied. I knew he was being serious, he would never leave me, we belonged together it was our destiny to be with each other for the rest of our lifes.
It was a warm summer evening, when (YN) my girlfriend and I walked down the streets, we were arguing with each other about stupid things. It was already really dark and we barely could see anything, we walked across the street. They next thing I know was that I woke up laying there on the ground, surrounded by paramedics. “(YN)” I screamed but nobody answered me. “Sir, could you please calm down, you just had a really bad accident” a paramedic said to me. “What has happened? I asked confused. “Sir, your girlfriend and you have been walking across the street, then a car came out of nowhere and crashed into you” the paramedic answered me. “Where is she, is she fine” I asked. “She lost a lot of blood, Sir but she will be fine” he said calmly. Then they took me into the ambulance and we drove down to the hospital. I couldn’t stop asking about (YN), I was so worried that I might never see her again. The doctor went in and looked at me then he said “You are going to have a few bruises and your hand is fractured, but you will be fine soon” he said. “Can I go and see my girlfriend?” I asked him. “Sir, I am sorry to tell you but we had to put her into artificial coma because she has a really bad head injury” the doctors said. I started crying immediately, it was all my fault I thought to myself. Then a nurse walked in, “Mr. Grimes, please come with me” she said. I followed her down the corridor, then we walked into a room. (YN) was laying there on the bed, I sat down on the bedside and linked my hand with hers. “If you want me to Mr. Grimes I can put a second bed into this room” the nurse said. I nodded my head and she walked out.
A week passed by slowly, I stayed in (YN)’s room all the time. I never left her side, I took care of her pretty much all the time. Mum and Dad came as often as they could, so did her parents. Edward my twin brother came to visit her once, he was too busy with working that’s why he couldn’t come around more often. What an awful excuse was what I’ve thought, he should be taking care of me as I used to do when we were little, but of course Edward was too focused on himself but I couldn’t care less for now as the only thing that really mattered for me was (YN). The doctor came in saying “Sir, we are now going to quit the artificial coma as her injury has been healing very well” he said. After a few minutes of waiting outside, I walked back in and saw that (YN) was slowly opening her eyes. I stroked her cheek gently “Hi, beautiful” I said and a tear of happiness streamed down my face. She looked at me, she looked slightly confused. “Who are you?” she said.
Your Point of View:
I woke up and felt a sharp pain in my head, I slowly opened my eyes. Right in front of me was standing a beautiful blond, pale tall guy, he stroked my cheek and said “Hi, beautiful”. I looked at him, why was this stranger stroking my cheek I thought to myself then I asked him “Who are you?” but he didn’t answered me, he just started crying . Then I looked around the room and realized that I am in a hospital. “Mrs. (your last name)?” the doctors said. I nodded my head, then the doctor whispered something into the guy’s ear and he left. “Mrs. (your last name) you had a very bad accident a week ago, you lost a lot of blood and your head has been injured as well” he said. I sighted , that’s probably why my head was hurting that much. “and it seems like you are also suffering memory loss” he said. I tried to speak, but I couldn’t . This was just way too much for me to handle right now.
Johns Point of View:
The doctor told me to go outside and so did I, a couple of minutes later I went back out of the room. “Your girlfriend Mrs Grimes is suffering memory loss” he said. “So, she really doesn’t know who I am? I asked. I whipped away my tears, “I am sorry to tell you but, apparently she really doesn’t know that you are her boyfriend” he said. “What do I do now” I asked him. “I think it’s best for Mrs (your last name) to go back home with you as she doesn’t need to be in the hospital any longer” he said. “Is her memory coming back” I asked. “That’s something we don’t know yet” he answered me. My whole body started shaking, and I tried to pull myself together but I couldn’t. (YN) the love of my life, the reason for me to live my life the fullest, doesn’t even know who I am I thought to myself. After I calmed down a bit, I walked back into (YN) room. I sat down on the chair next to her bed, “Hi (YN), I am John your boyfriend of 2 years” I said but she refused to speak to me, I stood up from the chair and started to pack up her belongings whilst she just laid there not even looking at me.
Back to your Point of View:
The blond guy walked back into the room, he sat down on the chair next to my bed. “Hi (YN), I am John your boyfriend of 2 years” he said. This couldn’t be true, I would remember being together with such an beautiful guy, but the last thing I remembered was that I was laying on my bed starring on the picture of my favourite boy band, I couldn’t remember the name of the band or their members I just knew that they were twins. I tried to remember their faces, but I couldn’t. I refused to speak with him for a while, but I needed answers so I asked him “How can I be sure, that you really are my boyfriend?” He looked at me, not knowing what to say. “you like music and you’ve always wanted to become a songwriter and you also have a big mole above your belly” he answered me, as he slightly smiled at me. “the mole isn’t that big” I said jokingly. So he really is my boyfriend I thought. “I guess, we life together?” I asked him. He nodded his head then he handed me some clothes and told me to dress myself. “Can you turn around whilst I change myself” I said.
He looked at my slightly confused but then turned around I quickly dressed myself and then we left the hospital together. I felt weird around him, as I couldn’t even remember one thing about him. We took a cap to our house, as we arrived I looked shocked at the huge house I was standing right in front of. “How can we afford a house like this” I asked John. “Long story” he said, “Are you coming?” he asked whilst he unlocked the door. I walked inside the house, got rid of my shoes and followed John into the living room. I couldn’t stop looking at the pictures on the wall, lots of pictures from me and John, we looked so happy on them. We sat down on the sofa and John made tea for us, “so (YN) what do you want to know?” he asked after a few minutes of silence. “How do we two now each other” I asked. “Where should I started?” he asked, “at the beginning” I said. Then he started to speak “it was a really crazy day, Edward and I had just landed in (your city) and some fans including you were waiting for us at the airport”
“Fans?” I interrupted him. “Oh crap you don’t know about that either, well actually Edward my twin brother and I are really famous singers, we call ourselves “Jedward” maybe you’ve heard that before” he said and sighted. “no I am sorry John, but I can’t remember anything” I answered, I felt so bad as I looked in Johns face, I saw that he was about to cry. “Oh John” I said and pulled him in for a hug. I could feel his tears rolling down my back, I couldn’t even imagine to be in his position, when someone who really means everything to you doesn’t remember anything about you. I knew there was a connection between us, but I wasn’t sure about whether I loved him or not. He pulled away from our hug, I whipped away his tears with my thumb. Then I leaned in to kiss me, but I stopped him with saying “John, please” “Sorry (YN), just an old habit I guess” he said with a sad voice. “Do you want to know more” he asked. “no John, I think it’s best for me to get some rest for now” I said. “Ok” he said and walked with me upstairs into the bedroom. “Should I sleep on the sofa tonight?” he asked, the whole situation we were in was really awkward. “No, you don’t have to John” I replied. Then he showed me my cupboard, I took out some PJ who looked really sweet and went into the bathroom which John has also showed me before. I changed quickly and then went back into the bedroom, John was already laying there on the bed, he gave me a quick smile and then I laid down next to him. I covered myself with the duvet and turned around to face John. “Do you want to know something (YN)” he whispered. “Yes, what?” I asked. “This is the PJ I have bought you to our one year anniversary” he said. I smiled as i knew something deep inside of me could remember John, I was sure about that. I laid my head down on John’s chest and he started to play with my hair, when I all the sudden got a flashback. “(YN)” John asked me slightly worried. I sat up in bed and looked at him confused “John, does the word pop rocket mean something to you?” I asked. John started laughing immediately, “John, I am being serious, ok?” I said confused about his reaction. “Well, yes it does mean something to me (YN)” “Why are you laughing then!” I asked him. “because you used to call my … you know (looked down on his pop rocket) like this & it’s a song from us ” he replied. I slightly blushed as I found it really embarrassing that I’ve actually called his private part like this.
I couldn’t even remember having sex once. So John has been the only one I’ve slept with I thought to myself. I laid back down to face John again. “Goodnight” I said. “Goodnight (YN)” John replied, then I turned around and fell asleep. The next morning when I woke up, John had already left. I went to the bathroom and took a long shower, after showering for what seemed a lifetime I went into the kitchen as I saw a note laying there on the table I picked it up and read “Went to the studio with Edward, when I come back home we are going to do something really special xx John”, I smiled at the note and I actually was really excited about what we were going to do. I decide to try to bring back some memories so I went upstairs into the bedroom and went through a lot of stuff, I couldn’t find something special. I knew when I lived back at home with my mum and dad I used to hide things under my bed so I walked over to the bed and looked under it, I found a small box. I took the box and sat down on the bed, the box was really dusty. I opened it and the first thing that caught my eyes was a picture of me and John kissing, I took the picture and started going through all the other stuff that was inside. I found a picture of me hugging Edward, I just knew it wasn’t John, don’t knew why. Then I found a letter I could recognise my handwriting, and started reading “Dear John, today has been the best day of my life, I met you and Edward and you gave me this really sweet bracelet. I’m actually wearing it right now, the other girls are so jealous because you gave it to me. I hope I will meet you again one day (YN). Then all the sudden I could remember everything about that day. Waiting on the airport for hours until they arrived, screaming with a lot of other girls and then they arrived my favourite singers Jedward. My thoughts got interrupted by John as he walked into the room, Edward standing right beside him. “John, I can actually remember the day on the airport” I screamed, I had to pull myself together as I actually was a little bit fangirling when I saw them both. I hugged John and quickly kissed his cheek, then I hugged Edward “Jedhug” I said whilst hugging him. I couldn’t stop smirking. “So, what are we going to do?” I asked them. “We are doing nothing, you and John are gonna do something” Edward said. “Oh” I said, “Just come with me” John said and took my hand, he leaded my outside the house. “Why are we leaving Edward alone at our house” I asked. “(YN), Edward is living with us” he said. Then we walked a few minutes down the streets we walked in a really nice park, and sat down on a bench. Then John started talking “you know (YN), this is the park were we first met, I mean were we had like our first date”, he blushed a little what I found looked really cute. “Cool” I said. Then we sat there a few minutes in silence. “You know John, this is actually so crazy, I mean I can remember being a crazy fangirl, but never in my life would I’ve thought that I was going to be your girlfriend one day” I said.
John smiled and gestured for me to sit down on his lap, so I sat down on his lap. We looked deeply into each others eyes. “Do you want to know something?” he asked. I nodded my head, “this is also the bench were we both first kissed” he said as he leaned in to kiss me, is kissable lips touching mine, his warm tongue sliding across my bottom lip. It felt amazing and I got a really weird feeling inside my belly. I kissed him back passionately our tongues gently massaging each other. After I while off kissing I pulled away from him. “I am freezing” I said. “Let’s go home then” John said then we went back home the whole way back to the house we didn’t talk to each other, as we reached our house John unlocked the door, Edward was sitting in the living room watching telly. John just said “Hi” to him and then walked upstairs without saying anything to me, I was slightly confused that he was acting weird now as I was the one who doesn’t remember anything about our relationship. I headed to the sofa and sat down next to Edward, “what’s up?” I asked him. “nothing” he replied “Edward.. can I ask you something?” I whispered. “Yes, what?” he said. “is John alright?” I asked. “I dunno (YN) I really don’t know, we aren’t that close like we were 2 years ago” he said and sighted. “Why?” I asked. “ long story (YN)” he said and then switched off the telly. “it’s because of me isn’t it?” I said but Edward refused to answer me. “Edward, I can take it, seriously” I said. “not just about you” he said and then left me sitting there on the sofa all by myself. I felt tears filling up my eyes, I was about to cry, I felt so guilty. What has really been happening the last past 2 years? I felt something really special when I kissed John, but why was he ignoring me now? Did I do something wrong? I questioned myself. I got up from the sofa and walked upstairs, as I reached our bedroom door I heard John crying quietly. I quickly opened to door and saw John laying there on the bed, his duvet was covering his whole body. “John” I said. “Please (YN) go I don’t want you to see me like this” he replied “No” I said and headed to the bed.
I laid down next to him and pulled to duvet over me too, so now we both were laying there covered with the duvet. “I am so sorry” I said and wrapped my arms around him. “It’s not your fault” he said snivelling. I whipped away his tears and slightly kissed his cheek. “Why are you crying then?” I asked. “I am scared that you won’t be able to remember me (YN), what if you find a nice normal guy and fall in love with him” he said, tears streamed down his face again. “John, you don’t have to be scared because I am not leaving you, even if my memory is not coming back” I answered him. “Why wouldn’t you?” he asked. “John, because I am falling in love with you all over again” I said shyly. I could catch him smiling quickly. “Really?” he said and then I leaned in to kiss him, our lips touching each other, both of us completely enjoying this special moment. Our kiss turned into making out, John’s hands gently moving over my whole body, I liked it even though it was kind a new for me. (YN) you can do this, this isn’t your first time, it’s your boyfriend I thought to myself to calm myself down a bit. Then I decided to undress myself, John looked at me and asked “Are you sure, we don’t have to?” he said. I nodded me head and we both undressed ourselves. John climbed on top of me, I was unsure about what would happen next. John started kissing my neck gently, leaving behind a trail of wet kisses, which made me moan out quietly. “You’ve always liked this” he whispered into my ear which made me giggle. I could feel his already hard pop rocket digging into my thighs, I looked down and so did John. His face slightly blushed, “Ready, it doesn’t hurt I promise” he said and then guided himself into me. I moaned out loudly as he entered me. Then he started to thrust his hips, it felt amazing, after a while of continuing we both reached our climax. John climbed off of me and wrapped his arms around me tightly. Then he kissed my cheek, “John, can you do something for me?” I asked. “Anything you want beautiful” he said smilingly. “Please, talk to Edward”. John frowned at me “why should I?” he asked, “because John he is your twin and I think you both aren’t that close as you have been before” I said.
“(YN) you don’t even have a clue about it” he replied. “Then tell me” I answered. “it’s a long story” John practically shouted at me. I stood up from the bed and dressed myself “You completely ruined this moment John, it’s just talking I didn’t tell you to kill somebody” I said and then left the room. Where am I going now I asked myself, I had to think quick before John even tries to follow me I thought, then I tiptoed upstairs not even having a clue where I was going, then I reached an attic at least something that looked like it was. Perfect, John wouldn’t come upstairs, as he probably was thinking that I went outside I thought. I looked around the, the attic was quiet big and a lot of moving boxes were inside. To my surprise there also was a big comfy bed behind them. It looked like someone used to sleep there, I sat down on the bed and started to think things through, I had so many question but neither Edward nor John would give them to me. Both of them seemed to be afraid of my reaction at least that’s what I’ve thought. I sat there for a long time not doing anything, I didn’t even heard noises from downstairs so I guessed nobody was home, they were probably searching for me I thought. I felt bad for hiding, and to worry them but at least they could talk to each other whilst they were searching I thought to calm myself down a bit. I walked over to the boxes and opened one, the box was full of fan letters. I closed the box because I didn’t wanted to read something, that didn’t belonged to me. All the sudden I heard someone screaming loudly, “It’s your fault John, it’s all because of you” it was Edward, I heard John screaming to but I couldn’t hear what I was shouting, they kept shouting for a bit and then I heard doors banging. I could hear footsteps, someone was about to come to the attic. I quickly ran over to the bed and tried to hide myself but that was clearly not possible. The door opened quietly, then I saw Edward. “What the hell?” he said quietly. “Please ‘Edward, don’t tell John” I said. Edward nodded his head and walked over to the bed. “What are you doing here” he asked me. “had an argument with John” I answered. “I know, but why are you hiding here we were searching for you” he said.
“I don’t know, I thought I wouldn’t search for me here” I said. Edward looked in to my eyes and said “I guess you are used to hiding here” he smiled. “What are you on about?” I questioned him. “Nothing (YN)” he replied “you should probably go downstairs and talk to him, he is going crazy” he said. I nodded my head, “Edward, but before I leave I want to know one thing – why is everything Johns fault” I asked and looked at him. Edward’s facial expression immediately changed, he looked like he was scared of something. “I was just angry because John was being a jerk” he said. I knew he was hiding something, but he was clearly too scared to tell me. I stood up from the bed and walked to the door but before I left I said “I know you two are hiding something, it’s not fair to keep things from me, you both should remember that my memory is coming back sooner or later. I closed the door behind me, and walked downstairs. I didn’t want to face John now, but I had to as I knew he was really worried. I went to our bedroom but John wasn’t there, I walked downstairs and as I reached the last step, John saw me. I ran over to me and hugged me tightly “promise me that you’ll never scare me that much again, where have you been (YN)” I pulled away from the hug “in the attic” I answered. “Why were you hiding in the attic?” he asked he seemed confused and a bit angry. “don’t know, John seemed like the right place to hide” I answered. “Yeah, you’ve always liked the attic don’t you” he whispered he was clearly pissed off I could hear it in his voice. “John, what is going on with you and Edward, can’t you two just be honest with me?” I screamed . “Give me answers now, or I swear I will leave now for good and I’ll never come back” I threatened him, but I again refused to tell me everything so I ran upstairs and took a random bag and packed up some stuff of mine, John followed me. He tried his best to calm me down, but this was just too much for me. John took the bag away from me and said “You aren’t leaving (YN), stop being stupid”, I was so angry at John that I couldn’t handle my emotions anymore. I started screaming like crazy “I am leaving John, go away give me the bag and fuck off I don’t even love you, you are a stranger to me” I screamed. Then Edward walked in our room “(YN) calm down” Edward said. John directly headed to Edward and slapped him in his face. “Fuck off Edward” he screamed into his face. Edward just stood there not doing anything. “Are you stupid John?” I screamed and walked over to Edward, I took his hand and leaded him outside the room, before I left I screamed “I regret being your girlfriend, even though I don’t remember anything” I shut the door behind me and Edward and we both walked outside the house. “What are we doing now?” Edward asked. “We are staying at my mums” I answered. Then we took a cap to my mums house, I knocked on the door and my mum opened me “(YN) what are you doing here?” she asked. “Mum could Edward and I stay overnight, John is not around and we both forgot our keys” I lied. I could tell that she knew that I was lying. “Sure” she said.
Edward and I walked inside the house. We drank a cup of tea with my mum and then we walked back into my old room. We sat down on my bed “She knows we are laying” Edward said “I know Edward” I answered him. “Are you scared of John?” I asked him. “No, not really” he said. “I need answers Edward, I really do” I said and sighted. Edward stood up from the bed and looked outside the window then he started to speak “I feel so bad that I am the one who has to tell you this, but to be honest, for once at least, John did nothing wrong he is just scared to lose you and I completely get it you know” he said. “Edward, please get to the point now” I said. “He thinks we had an affair” he said. “What?” I asked. “Before the accident happened, we both used to spend much time together in the attic” he said. OMFG I thought to myself what an awful girlfriend have I been, I better should have died after the accident happened. “Does this mean I was cheating on him with you” I managed to say. “No (YN) don’t be stupid, you would have never cheated on him and we don’t like each other this way” he said. “Then what were we doing in the attic?” I asked him. “After you’ve found out about me being in love with this girl, she is a fan you know we tried to find her letter to get her address because I really want to get to know her” he answered shyly. “I didn’t wanted John to know because he is so used to protect me and he doesn’t want me to get hurt, and well you’ve found out and I needed help you promised not to tell him” he said. I was so confused, first it seemed like John was the bad guy, then I thought I was the bad one cheating on him with Edward and now, everything was just a complete misunderstanding. “What do we do now?” I was so confused, this whole situation I was in was just ridiculous. “What are we doing now” I asked again. “I don’t know” Edward answered me, he seemed really upset. “Come on Edward, I am the one who doesn’t remember anything, not even the slightest thing” I said, I looked at him, I was getting really angry at him.
“Just because you didn’t had the guts to tell him, look what you’ve done” I spoke out loudly. “(YN) calm down, please I didn’t wanted to cause trouble I swear” he said, I could barley hear him as he tried to speak as quiet as possible so that my mum wouldn’t hear anything. “We are leaving now Edward, I don’t care of you want to talk to him or not you just have to” I said. Then we both went upstairs. “Mum, we are leaving, the locksmith is coming over to our house” I said, mum looked at me slightly astonished. “Can I talk to you for a second? “ she asked me and then looked at Edward “alone” she said. “I’ll wait outside” Edward said and walked outside, “(YN), why are you lying at me?” me mum asked. “I am not” I replied. “I overheard you and Edward when you were talking don’t you dare lie now” she said. “Things are complicated mum, I feel like I am living a nightmare. I don’t remember my boyfriend and nothing else from the last past 2 years” “everybody could lie to me, everybody could tell me stories that actually never happened, I don’t know who I should trust I don’t know who is telling the truth” I answered, mum hugged me tightly. “You know (YN), John loves you and you should trust him after all he was the one who was sitting next to your bed all day, holding your hand after the accident” she whispered into my ear. “Thanks mum” I said and pulled away from the hug. “Take Care” she said as I left the house too.
Edward was already sitting in the cab, I sat down in the back of the car and then we started driving back to our house, before Edward unlocked the door I said to him “He must be really angry, so keep distance” , Edward nodded his head and we both went inside. As we reached the living room we saw John sitting there on the sofa, he looked at us and I could see I was about to go mental. “Back, so early? Oh Edward I thought you could to better, I mean when I fucked her it wasn’t that quick” he said and grinned at us evily. “We didn’t do anything” Edward said. “Common bro, I know you fucked her, I wasn’t enough for her” he screamed. Then he stood up and headed to me, he faced me and screamed into my face “You dirty little slut”, tears filled up my eye, I know he was angry but couldn’t he just listen for once? “John, please calm down, I swear nothing happened ever, you are my twin you should know I never would do something like this and neither would (YN)” Edward said calmly. John faced away from me and looked at Edward “then why are you both keeping secrets and run away with each other” he asked him. Then Edward told him the whole story, I was just sitting there not saying anything as those words John called me really hurt me. After Edward had told him everything, John apologised a couple of times for his reaction but he also was a bit hurt by the fact that we kept something like this a secret from him. “I am going to bed, I think you two have a lot to talk about” I said and went to upstairs into the bedroom. Neither John nor Edward said anything to me when I left. I went to the bathroom and took a long shower, to clear my thoughts. I shouldn’t be angry at John because he called me a slut, but I was. I knew he didn’t mean it but on the other hand, I knew that I loved him otherwise I would be that angry. After the shower I laid down in bed, I couldn’t sleep I was just waiting for John to come and to talk, I waited for a long time but John didn’t showed up. So I headed upstairs to see what they were doing as I reached the living room I saw them laying there on the sofa, both fast asleep, both had a smile on their face. Then all the sudden some parts of my memory came back.
*Flashback*
I could see John clearly, it was in the park we were sitting on the bench we sat the day before, he sat there not looking at me, shyly smiling at me. Then I remembered kissing him and the special feeling I felt. He seemed so happy and so did I, then I remember how he asked me if I wanted to be his girlfriend, it was such a special day, we both fell in love immediately. I even could remember who I lost my virginity to John, actually we both lost our virginity together. I did remember his touches and his sloppy kisses, he was so scared to hurt me and he really was gently, it hurt a bit but it was special. I remembered feeling special, whenever John was around, but I also remembered who much hate they got when the fans found out about me. The last thing I could remember was moving in with him and Edward and what a stressful day this has been, moving boxes all around the house.
Then I got back to reality, I felt dizzy, and my head was pounding like crazy, I looked at John and Edward both of them were still sleeping, laying there on the sofa. I walked over to the sofa and woke up John “John, come with me upstairs” I whispered in to his ear. John just nodded his head and walked with me upstairs still half asleep. We laid down on our bed, “John?” I asked, “Yes” he replied “I don’t want you to be mad at me, believe me I didn’t mean what I said earlier and I hope you didn’t mean what you’ve said about me earlier” I said. “I was just angry (YN), I was so scared to lose you and the fact that I thought you and Edward would betray me like this was just crazy” he answered. “I do love you John” I said, “I love you too (YN) he said. “and I do remember more now” I said, John smiled “what do you remember?” he asked and pulled his arms around me tightly. “Everything until the day we moved in here” I said. “That’s a great progress you know” he said and kissed my cheek. “I know, I’ll hope that I will remember everything one day” I said. “You know, you don’t have to remember everything, we had our ups and downs the last few months” he said. “Why?” I asked. John sighted “I don’t know if I should tell you” he said slightly worried. “I can take it” I said. “I wanted to take our relationship to the next level, not marriage though I wanted to start a family and you said you weren’t ready now” he said whilst he looked away from me. I sighted “John?” I said and looked at him, “we should try” I said.
“What should we try?” he asked. “trying to get pregnant” I answered I could see the huge smile on John’s face. “Do you really think we are ready for this, we don’t have to, we have time” he said, but I stopped him by kissing him, our lips gently touching each other, our tongues collided, I climbed on top of John and started kissing his neck roughly. I was desperate for his touches, I now we only did it yesterday but yesterday was different from today because I actually could remember something, I now know what John likes. “This is going to be so special” I whispered in his ear. He giggled slightly then I started to take off his shirt and reviled his pale, sexy body I touched his abs and went further down to unbutton his jeans and then I took it off too. John was now laying there just in his underwear, I slightly squeezed his already hard pop rocket through his underwear which made him moan out loudly. Then I quickly undressed myself, John got rid of his boxers and I started to ride him, we both moaned in pleasure. “OMFG” I screamed as I reached my orgasm. A few minutes later John reached his too. I collapsed on top of John, he was still inside of me, I rested my head on his chest and we continued to lay there for a while. I climbed off of John and laid down next to him, “I hope we didn’t woke Edward up” I whispered. Then John and I started to giggle. “I love you” I said “I love you too” John said and then we both fell asleep.
The next morning I woke up, John was still fast asleep, I quickly dressed myself and went downstairs to the kitchen. Edward was sitting there on the table, eating cereal. “Morning” I said “Hi” Edward said. “I am glad that you and John made up Edward, and I have to tell you something, I do remember everything until the day we moved in to this house” I said. “I am too, seriously (YN) this is amazing” Edward said and smiled. “How are things with you and the fan girl, you love so much” I asked. “not good” Edward replied. “Why?” I asked “we were secretly dating for a while, but I guess you know she wasn’t worth it” he answered me. I could tell I was keeping something from me, this wasn’t just an normal answer this was more of a heavy hint. “What are you on about Edward” I asked. “(YN) you know exactly what I am talking about, I am not playing your stupid game anymore, don’t act like you don’t remember anything” he said. “Edward, what’s wrong with you” I asked. “I believed you at first, but then I overheard you and John yesterday, it’s a bit strange that you can remember everything till the day we moved in, don’t you think?” he said annoyed. “Edward, I don’t know what you are talking about” I replied. What was really happening the last few months? “Come on (YN), I know that you know so stop pretending” he said. “I am… “ I said but our conversation got interrupted by John who walked into the kitchen. “Morning Guys” he said and then went over to kiss my cheek, I looked at Edward and he looked at me. Something was different this time, he looked really jealous I thought.
“Edward, (YN) and I are going to try to get pregnant” John said with excitement. Edwards face went bright red “I thought you wanted to wait?” he asked. “no, I am ready for starting a family with John know” I said to answer is question. Then Edward stood up and as he walked out of the room I heard him saying in a low voice “Whatever”. Now I was confused more than ever, why was Edward acting like this all the sudden? “(YN) Have you been fighting with Edward?” John asked. “No, we weren’t why?” I lied. “I seemed a bit upset, that’s all” he replied. “Anyway, I have to get ready now beautiful, but when I come home we should try again, if you want to” John said and wrapped his arms around my waist. “Sure” I replied and kissed him, than he went upstairs to get ready. There I was, again confused not knowing any answers. I sat down on the chair and drank a cup of tea, after that I walked into the living room and started to clean up the mess from the last past days. I cleaned for a while, John had already left and Edward was still at home. I wasn’t sure about whether I should try to talk to him or not, but there was one thing I was sure about, I needed to know what he was on about. So I headed upstairs, I knocked on Edward’s door and opened it, but he wasn’t there. His room looked so familiar.
I know I had been there before, the next thing I did was I went upstairs into the attic, because I knew we used to spent a lot of time there. I walked straight through the door and saw Edward sitting there in the corner of the attic, holding a letter in his hands. “Leave” he screamed at me. “Edward? Tell me the truth now, and don’t you dare lie to me again” I snapped back at him. “Fine, you really want to know the truth (YN)? You have been cheating on John with me, ever since we moved into this house, this bed here – was ours, we used to fuck each others brains out right there every time John was away” he screamed. Tears filled up my eyes, my sight went blurry and the next thing I could remember was that I was laying there on the bed in the attic, Edward looking worried over me. “What happened?” I asked him. “You passed out“ he answered. “Did I loved you?” I asked him, tears rolled down my cheek. “I think you did” he answered me and whipped away my tears. “Edward I love John, I am sorry” I managed to say. He sighted, I saw he was really upset about what I’ve just said. “Everything is my fault Edward, I destroyed everything I think its best that I am leaving now, I am going to tell John that I can’t life with him anymore because I don’t want to start a family yet” I said. “(YN), please don’t you will make everything worse than” he said. “No, believe me it’s for the best” I answered and stood up and walked upstairs into our bedroom, packed a bag and wrote a note for John saying “John, I am sorry I do love you, but I am not ready for this now, remember I will always love you me leaving is the best choice for all of us” and then I left the house, I looked back, a single tear rolled down my cheek. I will miss you, John I said to myself.
I went to my mum’s place, my eyes were red and sore from crying. “(YN), what happened” my mum said as she opened the door, she hugged me. “I am such a bad person mum, I really I am” I said. “No you aren’t sweetie, who did this to you” she replied. “I did this to myself mum” I said and started crying immediately. “Come on in, and we talk about it” she said. Then we went to the living room we talked for a long time, I told her everything. I could tell that she was really disappointed, but she offered me to stay at her place as long as it takes. I was really tired after our long talk, so I went upstairs into my old room. I unpacked my bag and sat down on my bed, I turned my phone on but there were now new messages or calls, so I knew that Edward told John everything. I just hoped that they would both move on and be there for each other, I wasn’t worth fighting for. I cried myself to sleep and prayed to never wake up again.
Months later
Things have been really hard for me the last past months, two days after I moved into my mums house all my other belongings were sent there, with a note from John saying “you made the best decision for all of us and a part of me will always love you”. I was reading the note again whilst I was sitting there on the sofa gently stroking my big belly “Yes John, a part of you will always be with me” I said. I found out about my pregnancy 8 months ago, next month I will give birth to John’s child. At first I was unable to cope with the situation but my mum helped me through everything. I was unsure about telling John and I decided it was best to stay out of his life for good. I can still not remember some parts of my memory, but I think that’s my fault because I really never wanted to know what an awful human being I had been back then. I caused so much trouble and sadness, that’s for sure but I made the best out of it. For some of you this may sounds weird, but it’s true. I could have stayed with John if I wanted to or worse I could have left John for Edward.
On March the 11th I gave birth to my beautiful daughter “Ava”, she looked just like John blond hair, pale skin, full lips and green eyes. She was the most beautiful child I have ever seen. I imagined John being there with us, he would be so happy if he would know. I sat there on the sofa with Ava in my arms, I showed her pictures of me and John. “This is your dad, honey” I said and pointed at the picture. “He is a famous singer and the most adorable guy if ever met in my life” I said. Ava couldn’t answer, she was just a baby back then. She used to laugh so much and everything about her reminded me of John. It was hard being a single mum, because I had to work a lot to pay for the rent and bills but I had to do it, Ava deserved to life a happy life, the next 5 years passed by so quickly. The older Ava got the more she reminded me of John. That day I picked Ava up from school, she seemed so confused. “What’s wrong hunny” I asked her. “Mummy, I really want to meet my daddy” Ava said, I looked in her green big eyes. She gave me the exact same look that John gave me when I really wanted something. “Hunny, I told you that your daddy doesn’t know about you I am sorry” I answered her. “this is so unfair mummy, all the other children have a dad and I don’t” she answered me, tears filled up her eyes. “Don’t cry sweetie, I will try to talk to him I promise” I answered. On the way home I couldn’t stop thinking. How do I contact John? Who would he react, after all those years? What if he already has a family? But there was only one thing to find out, I had to contact him.. Ava deserves to know her Daddy.
Later that day
The only thing I knew about John was the address of the house we used to live in together, I hoped that he still lives there as there was actually no other way to contact him. I don’t wanted to go, I had to do this for Ava and John, they both deserved to get to know each other. Ava is his daughter, no matter what happened in the past. No matter how much I still love him after all those years. “Mummy” Ava said as she walked in the living room, “Yes” I said “I love you, mummy” she said cutely. “I love you to, you don’t know how much I do” I answered her. I lifted her up and hugged her tightly, “but it’s time to go to sleep, go brush your teeth” I said. I let go of her and she walked into the bathroom. After brushing her teeth Ava laid down in her bed, “Do you want me to read a bedtimestory?” I asked her. “No mummy, I already know all of them” she answered me. “ok hun, sleep tight, I love you” I said and kissed her cheek. “Goodnight” Ava answered me. I went back into the living room and tried to get my thoughts of off John, but I didn’t work. After a while I went back into Ava’s room she was fast asleep, she looked like an angel. “Now or never” I quietly told myself. Then I started packing up some clothes, I lifted Ava up and carried her into my car. She was still fast asleep. Then I started driving in the middle of the night, 2 long hours later in the early morning I arrived at his house. I parked across the street and looked at the house, nothing had changed it still looked the same. “Mummy, where are we” Ava asked still half asleep. “sweetie, mummy needs to do something, can you wait for me here and promise me not to go anywhere I’ll be back in 2 minutes” I answered her. Ava nodded her head, I got out of the car and locked it. I walked across the street, I was getting really nervous, I reached the front door and then knocked slightly. I waited for a few minutes until somebody opened the door, but it wasn’t John. It was a beautiful young woman “Who are you and what are you doing here so early?” she asked unfriendly. “Sorry to bother you at this time, but is John Grimes still living here” I asked I tried my best to sound friendly. “Yes, my husband is still living here, what do you want from him?” she questioned me. I felt like crying, when she told me she was his wife “I need to talk to him, its important” I answered her. “Sorry, he is not at home give me your phone number and I will tell him to call you” she answered me harshly. I gave her my phone number and before she could ask me who I am I told her that I am in a hurry and left. I got back into the car, Ava was sleeping again. Tears streamed down my face, I couldn’t believe that John was married to this woman. I whipped my tears away and reminded myself of everything that has happened in the past. I frightened when somebody suddenly knocked on the car window, it was Edward.
He looked at me in shock, than I got out from the car. My whole body was shaking like crazy. “What are you doing here (YN)” Edward asked. “I need to talk to John” I answered him. “After all those years (YN) please just leave him alone” he said. “I can’t Edward, there is a reason why I am here” I said and pointed on Ava, who was still sleeping in the back of the car. “Ava wants to get to know her daddy” I said calmly. “What has happened in the past wasn’t her fault, it was mine” I said before Edward could say something else. “He is her father?” he asked in shock. “Yes” I answered him. Then we just stood there for a while not saying something. “When are you going to tell him?” he asked harshly. “I gave his wife my phone number, she said she will tell him to call me” I answered. “She won’t” Edward said. “Why?” I asked. “Because she knows exactly who you are!” he answered. “Edward please help me” I managed to say before I broke out in tears. “Don’t cry please” Edward said and then pulled me in for a long hug. “She wants to meet her dad Edward, she keeps asking me about him… she needs him” I stuttered. “I really want to help you (YN) but I can’t” he whispered in my ear. Then he left without even saying goodbye, leaving me there standing all by myself.
I went back into the car and started drove all the way back to my place. The whole way home I couldn’t stop thinking. Back at home Ava started to ask so many questions, I just couldn’t answer them, than I called my mum and asked her if she could take Ava over the weekend as I really needed to think things through. 2 hours later my mum arrived and took Ava with her, I felt a bit relived after they left. I sat there on the sofa when I heard someone knocking on the front door. I went to open the door, probably mum just forgot something I thought. I opened the door and said “Mu..m” but it wasn’t her. It was John, he looked so sexy, more manlier. I gazed in his beautiful green eyes, still in shock of course. “We both need to talk, may I come in” he said calmly. “Come on in” I answered him. We went in to the living room and sat down on the sofa. “Did Edward tell you” I asked him. “Edward? What should he be telling me (YN)?” he answered confused “Why are you here than, after all those years?” I asked him. “Because, you were at my place earlier and you said to my manager that you needed to talk about something important? He said. “Manager? She told me she was your wife?” I said. “She thought that you are one of those fans who still come by from time to time – she keeps telling them that she is my wife” he said and smiled. “So how comes that you want to talk about something now after 5 years?” he asked “well, John there is something I have to tell you and I am really sorry I didn’t told you 5 years ago” I said and sighted. “tell me” he said nicely. “Don’t be like that John, don’t be nice I don’t deserve it, believe me” I stood up from the sofa and started speaking “John, do you remember when we tried to get pregnant?” I asked. He nodded his head. “I got pregnant” I nearly whispered. “What Pregnant, does this mean?” John said in shock. “Yes, her name is Ava, your daughter’s name is Ava” I said. “Daughter” was all he managed to say I waited for his reaction, for him to scream at me and leave but he continued sitting there on the sofa in silence.
“I am sorry John” I said. A looked at him, a single tear streamed down his face. I felt so guilty, “Can I see her” he asked. “Of course, but she is with my mum now” I answered. “You know (YN), I get that you left me, because you weren’t ready for a family back then but why didn’t you come back after you’ve found out that you are pregnant? “ he asked. I was confused, what was he talking about? Then all the sudden I heard someone knocking on the door again. “I’ll be back soon” I said and walked to the front door, “What are you doing here?” I asked as I opened the door, Edward standing right in front of me. He went inside my house without even asking “Where is John” he asked and then followed me in to the living room. “(YN), John I swear I didn’t mean to do those things, please forgive me please” he nearly screamed. “What are you on about?” we both asked at the same time. Then he started speaking “I lied (YN), we never had an affair I just couldn’t handle the thought that you love John not me” he screamed. “bastard” John screamed and stood up to face Edward. “Leave now, or I swear I will kill you” John screamed in his face. Then suddenly all the missing parts of my memory came back finally after waiting for them all those years, my sight went blurry and I knew that I was about to faint. I woke up after a while, still a bit dizzy. My head was resting on John’s lap, “Where is he John” I asked “He left, I just hope I never comes back”” he whispered. I sat up and faced John “Edward ruined our lives, John he did” I said to him. John nodded and then started crying. “I just can’t believe my own brother would do something like this, this is so selfish, what was he thinking?” John stuttered. I hugged John tightly, than we both sat there for a while not saying anything. There were actually now words to say, what Edward did was so wrong. It was his fault that Ava never got to meet her daddy, he made me believe that I was a horrible person, all those years I have suffered for nothing.
“Do you want to see pictures of Ava” I asked. “Yes, of course” he answered me, than I showed him pictures of Ava. “She looks like me” he said with tears filling up his eyes. “Yeah, she is beautiful” I answered him and smiled, John looked deeply into my eyes. Then he leaned in to kiss me, his soft lips touching mine and there it was the amazing feeling I always got when I kissed him. Our kiss got more rougher, I sat down on Johns lap whilst we continued to kiss, his hands moved all over my body. “John, stop it” I whispered as he tried to unbutton my skinny. “Oh sorry, we don’t need to you know, it just seemed so right” he answered sweetly. “Oh John, I really want to do this but we should continue in my bedroom” I said. Then I led him into my bedroom, we both stripped out of our clothes and jumped on my bed, then John climbed on top of me and started to kiss my neck, I felt his already hard pop rocket digging into my thigh. “Do it” I moaned as I was really desperate to feel him inside off me. Then I guided his pop rocket inside of me. “ooh my good” I screamed in pleasure as John started to thrust his hips then he went faster and faster until we both reached our orgasm. We continued to lay there both of us out of breath, our hearts beating fast. “I’ve missed you so much” I said whilst John climbed off of me. “I missed you too (YN)” he answered me whilst he pulled the duvet over us, to cover our still naked bodys. He wrapped his arms around my waist and we both fell asleep immediately.
I woke up in the morning with a huge smile on my face, John slightly kissed my cheek. “morning, beautiful” he whispered “morning” I replied. “(YN), can I ask you something?” he said, “anything” I replied. “Would you like to move in with me, with Ava of course” he asked. “John? Are you serious? Of course I want to” I answered with excitement. “I still love you, you know” he nearly whispered, I kissed him. “I love you so much John” I answered him. I was the happiest girl in the world to call him my boyfriend again after all those years.
Months later
“Mummy, Daddy his back” Ava screamed from the kitchen. I went into the kitchen and saw John holding Ava in his arms. “Hi” I said and pecked him. Then he gently stroked my belly. “Hi, there” he said to my belly. “He or she, is doing a lot of movement in there” I said jokingly. “Daddy, I have to show you so much come with me” Ava said. “I’ll be back in a second” John said and kissed my cheek. I knew that this was going to take a long time, John wasn’t gone that long but Ava always had to show him everything she did whilst he was away. She clearly loves her daddy even though she just knows him for a short time, Edward was gone for good, he sometimes texted John to let him know he was still alive, but he wasn’t going to come back ever again and we don’t talk about him anymore. I enjoyed being pregnant again, because John and I really wanted to. I waited for 2 hours before John came back from Ava’s room. “Sorry, but she was so excited I just couldn’t leave her” he said and smiled. “I know, sometimes I think she loves you more than me” I said teasingly “come on (YN) don’t be stupid” he answered and smiled. “How are you, how is the baby?” he asked and sat down next to me. “Everything is fine John” I answered him and then I leaned in to kiss him “as long as you are with me” I whispered. “I am never going to leave you anyway” he replied. I knew he was being serious, he would never leave me, we belonged together it was our destiny to be with each other for the rest of our lifes.
The End.
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